Son, lying comes natural to all of us; it doesn’t have to be taught or learned by watching others do it. If you take most 2 year olds and ask them if they were the ones who did something bad, they deny it, even when the proof is staring right at them. We are all born with the capacity to lie; it is much easier than telling the truth a lot of times. I must have been born with a double dose; I was the best at it. I would lie when I was younger, but eventually the truth would come out. As I got older I could lie and cover it up so well that I believed it in my own head. I had lies that no one would ever know about.
There are still lies that I have not admitted to yet, stupid ones that I know would be ok if I owned up to them now, but it is still hard. Lies end up snowballing and getting bigger and bigger as time goes by. They can get so big; that the original reason you lied is pale in comparison to the hole you dug yourself into keeping up with the lie. I was so good at it, I didn’t have many snowball on me. However, I felt it inside. The guilt became unbearable. In essence the guilt got bigger and bigger until I could barely live with myself. I got mad at others for questioning my lies. I resented anyone who would call me on my bluff. I would tell myself I would prove it to them by never ever owning up to it. The guilt over some stupid little mistake I made overwhelmed me. I became defensive. I became miserable. Had I just owned up to my mistake in the first place things would have been much better. I believe this is one of the many ways God tries to teach us a lesson.
Now, it wasn’t like I was hiding the fact I murdered someone or cheated on a loved one. Still, after years of hiding it and trying to remember which story I told which person, it became exhausting. Because I believe in God and his awesome power to know exactly what I was doing, I felt the guilt deep inside. I felt like a fake. I would have people ask me about things and would struggle to remember because what I told them wasn’t true. The truth is ALWAYS easy to remember.
No matter how mad you think I will be with you, please tell me the truth. I will be more upset that you lied than I will be at whatever you are trying to cover up. Admit your mistakes, no matter how foolish or embarrassing you think they may be. Remember, you can hide the truth from others, but you can’t hide it from yourself or God. The angst and misery you will feel down the road are much more stressful than had you just admitted you were wrong. Lies are why a lot of people end up alcoholics or drug addicts. The pain of the guilt becomes so bad they seek any way to forget about it. Drugs and alcohol can dull that pain for a while, but they can’t take it away. Someday you will read about all my lies, and the ways I used to cover up the guilt I had. I just hope you will take away some learning from it. I hope it will help you avoid the same pitfalls I experienced.
I love you so much son, you mean more to me than anything! That is no lie!
Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor, for we are all members of one body.